Character, Courage, Growth, Lessons

Echo Chamber

I have lived a large portion of my life in an echo chamber.  Even once I was old enough to make my own decisions, I was more comfortable staying in the echo chamber than venturing out.  Voices would come and go – as my opinions and beliefs did – but the only voices within hearing distance were the ones that echoed my own.

There is something super comforting about others agreeing with you, happily confined to our “us against them” mentality.  We stay inside our bubbles and only listen to the people who make us feel good about our opinions.  “See? We are all right.”

Mental high fives all around.

Life is lived easy in an echo chamber.

I just don’t believe that is what we were called to do.  I believe we were called to reach across the aisle and try to understand what others are saying too.  Life isn’t one big, clear window to look out.  It’s more of a beautiful stained glass window with an intricate pattern that can only be seen from a higher perspective.

From your spot, you may look out and see everything from a rose colored tint.  From mine, a yellow hue.  Another may see the world out of the lens of royal blue.  Sometimes we are wedged in a spot where the glass is bubbled and thick, which limits our clear view of anything.  Our view colors our perspective of reality, and we become comfortable with only the people with our same view.

One fact is that we can always move to another spot of the stained glass window.

Don’t like your view? Change it.

I’ve been guilty of not liking what I was seeing or hearing, so I rushed back into the echo chamber, slammed the door shut and asked the echos to assure me that I was correct in my view, voice, and actions.  I wouldn’t look at a book, listen to a song, or talk to a person who believed differently than I did.

I understand now when we are only allowing those in our echo chambers to speak into our lives, we will never grow.  Or at least grow outside the margins the chamber has set for us.  I don’t believe stunted growth is ever benign – it always finds a way to turn malignant.

Not long ago, a dear friend was in a bad spot emotionally and made a poor choice.  We gathered around to help pick up the pieces of a broken beloved.  While sitting around, talking and processing all the steps that lead her to this current moment, she quietly said that she surrounded herself with one, specific friend during that time because she knew this friend would support her fleeting feelings in that moment, instead of trying to gently turn her in the right direction and speak the real truth and light she needed to hear. She went to the echo chamber that would validate her most during that time.

We all do.

We know which Echo Chamber to find echo refuge in when we are stubborn enough to refuse to listen to a different voice.

In her book “Leaving Church”, Barbara Brown Taylor says,

“While it is generally more pleasant for me to encounter people who support my view of reality, I am finding that people who see things otherwise tend to do me a lot more good.  Like quantum physicists, they remind me that reality is more relational than absolute.”

What if we could listen with respect?  Give the benefit of a doubt?  Graciously assume good intentions?

What if we could disagree and still love one another well?

“The roads are different,” wrote Rumi, “but the goal is one. When people reach the goal, all those who yelled at each other along the road, ‘You are wrong!’ Or ‘You’re a blasphemer!’ forget all the possible difference. There, all hearts sing in unison.

What if we chose to be led by the voice of our hearts rather than the echo of our chamber or the noise of our culture?

Wonder what sounds are outside of the echos?  Step outside of it, you may be startled in the beginning, but let your ears and heart adjust.  Listen for the soft sounds that your brain pattern may not be used to, but our heart recognizes it well.

If you are most comfortable just living in an echo chamber, make sure the voices are healthy ones.

 

 

 

 

 

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