Life is made up of little moments, pieced together to create our whole journey. Slots of time filled with joy, sadness, and all the emotions in between. The hope is at the completion of our pilgrimage, there will be a balance of the light and dark, with more gladness than sorrow.
Years ago, we took a family trip to Cabo San Lucas with the boys, they were around seven and ten years old. We indulged in all the ridiculously expensive, touristy experiences; massages, swimming with the dolphins, parasailing, shopping, deep sea fishing, beach days, etc. One night we treated ourselves to a big family dinner at a fun restaurant – right on the beach in Cabo, where the tables are literally set up on the sand. As we were laughing breezily and stuffing our faces, a few locals on the beach quietly attempted to get our attention and sell us their goods.
One young boy and his sister looked to be about the same age as our boys. He came up holding a bundle of colorful bracelets, offering to personalize them with names woven into them. Looking at him, I wondered how it was that my boys ended up as the ones on vacation and he was a local, peddling homemade jewelry. It made me sad, sometimes I just don’t understand this life. I performed the cheesy tourist role – acting as if I couldn’t decide which beauty to choose, so I mentally counted the kiddos in our neighborhood and told him that was how many bracelets I needed. I took him up on his offer to weave Mason and McCray’s names into their bracelets. While he and his older sister sat in the sand to craft our jewelry, McCray couldn’t keep from watching them. At one point, he looked up at me with eyes full of sencerity and said, “Mom, even if his jewelry wasn’t as beautiful as it is, would you still buy it?”
I replied yes. He nodded, looked back at the boy and quietly said, “I would to.”
I will never forget the look on his face that night. His little mind recognizing that they weren’t that different and his little heart not understanding the unfairness of the situation. They were the same age, yet a country apart in their life experiences. McCray has always been my sensitive thinker who seems to feel things deeper than most. The boy selling jewelry could have been as happy as a clam with his life, but that encounter was used for a gentle teaching moment in my son’s journey. That evening, with our feet in the sand and our bellies full, he learned what compassion and empathy feel like.
When empathy is present, apathy cannot exist.” Jessica Honegger
We are not all that different. Don’t we all have the same core needs? What if we could just lean in to those we don’t understand, our neighbors who are experiencing life different from us? What if we could stop filling our lives with the perfect moments, situations, etc – and leave some margin to lean in and meet some of the needs that are right in front of us? Empathy can fill in a lot of gaps. Sister Joan Chittister tells us that “We are either growing or collapsing at every moment. We are becoming bigger souled or smaller souled at every moment.” Every single minute – not one wasted. She believes that the purpose of a human experience is to grow into God. To go beyond religion and become a prayer, by becoming a filter that sees our Creator in everything.
B-e-a-utiful. Oh, to live a kind of life where we see the Divine in everything. To grow bigger souled in each moment. We will slip occasionally, as we are human. Yet, we have an opportunity in every moment to grow, to lean in, to work at understanding and loving those who we deem different than us. We are not as different as it sometimes feels. Jesus was the greatest teacher of this, as he was always expanding his table to accommodate more hearts. We all have the same underground river running beneath our feet, the water of grace. Reach down and splash some on your neighbor.
A sweet memory in Cabo with my M&M boys