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Brave, Courage, Family, Gifts, Laughter, Parenting, Pause

Live This Day

May should come with a daily mascara alert.  Also, a personal soul cheerleader reminding you that you can do all the exhausting tasks this month throws on us.

I’m overwhelmed.  Which accurately describes every mother at the end of the school year.  But this year feels different having a senior. Because it is different.  It’s so different.  And dumb. I wish Senior year could have moved as slowly as his Fourth-Grade year – that one was a dousy.

My Momma-Heart is raw.  My brain keeps cheering me on that I can do all the hard things, while my heart is singing Meatloaf lyrics and informing me that it won’t do that.  It doesn’t feel like it can take one more last.  Not when there are so many things that I still need to tell him and teach him.  My friend gave the advice to have all the conversations and say all the things – so that keeps me up at night.  Only my darling isn’t too receptive when I pad my bare feet across the house to have a heart to heart, hoping he is awake as well.  Nor does he care about learning how to perform the heimlich maneuver on himself or the most efficient way to load a dishwasher.

I don’t want to brag, but I handle being overwhelmed like a champ.  In the case you need some advice on this so the rest of your May can be smooth, let me offer some tips that I find helpful:

  • I simply quit living.  I stop being proactive on my schedule and quit looking at my calendar in hopes it will stop time. It’s odd that this doesn’t work and only adds to the frustration of being overwhelmed with tardiness and lack of preparation.  But, keep trying it.
  • I mentally hit the snooze button on the household work and checklists that normally keep our life running smooth.
  • I don’t grocery shop until the natives start hollering that we are out of milk and “everything”.
  • I curl up in bed when possible, and stare at a lot of walls and even more piles of towels that are begging to be folded.  Towels are so needy sometimes. Fold yourself.

The biggest lie is that this will stop the inevitable from happening.  Time marches on, whether we are present for the moments or not.  The world doesn’t stop turning just because we are stuck in reliving our memories.  I’ve learned we miss a lot of sweet moments if we are staring into space thinking they aren’t happening.

CS Lewis tells us, “What you see depends on where you are standing”.  This is never more true than when your baby is about to leave the nest.  I stand behind him and see my handsome boy standing in a pile of beautiful baby feathers he has shed throughout the years.  He stands at the edge of our nest and sees his future laid out wide in front of him. It is sweet to watch him stretch his wings in preparation to fly, but the sweet is wrapped in a somber blanket of not wanting it to be over.

You may not have a senior, you might just be dealing with the other side of our current crazy – end of the school year crap.  Banquets, Recitals, Award assemblies, class parties, school parties, standardized testing…bless.  You just thought you turned in all the paperwork in September.  There is a whole ‘nother pile of summer camp signups for everything your child ever considered doing.  Then the darlings decide to take a growth spurt the last month of school and you’d better go buy them all the new clothes since their shorts are closer to the “booty short” description than “prep length”.  It’s enough to overwhelm June Cleaver, no wonder we get stuck in sensory overload.

While I can’t take out the calories of our emotional eating, I can offer this…

Pause Momma.  Say no to all the unimportant tasks that aren’t relevant to this short season.  Create margin for breathing so you can have the energy and strength to be present for living.  Live this day.

The towels might end up learning how to fold themselves.  After all….we did figure out how to put a man on the moon. I’m just sayin’….

May 11, 2018 by
Boundaries, Brave, Courage, Crazy Cycle, Friendship, Laughter

Cull the Crap Day

A few years ago Amy and I were sharing funny stories about high school days.  We became friends in adulthood, actually through motherhood, so we didn’t share our teenage experiences.   While laughing at our choice in ex-boyfriends, crushes, and fashion, (Hello high waisted jeans…please go away for good) Amy mentioned that she always ended up talking to guys she wasn’t interested in because she didn’t want to hurt their feelings.  If I communicated only in Emojis, there would be the gal with her hand raised here.  Same.

Always.  My people pleasing ways had no boundaries.  Zero. None. Zilch.

If you haven’t met Amy, let me explain a few things to you.  Amy was the All-American girl, she will hate this whole paragraph, but it’s all true.  She is blonde, blue eyed, great athlete, cheerleader, good friend, Homecoming Queen, Buckaroo Queen, a Texas Tech Red Raider, a teacher…and later a great mom and good friend.  She is so beautiful that it’s stupid.  She and her daughter have these blue eyes that deserve to have a crayon named after them, only to be rivaled with their hearts and smiles.  Her facial expressions make me laugh harder than any other, especially in moments that I’m not supposed to.  So, can you even imagine being a teenage boy and NOT liking her?

Amy and I, It’s true that every brunette needs a blonde best friend.

Apparently, there were a couple of guys that were really vying for her attention, and put forth their best effort by pulling out their most impressive talents. Her doorbell rang a lot that year.

One ring brought a kid that wanted to show her his karate moves.  Amy politely watched and kindly told him how good he was. Another visit brought a boy who wanted her to listen to all the different languages he could speak.  The last straw came when the knock on the door produced a guy who came to show Amy that he could do the splits.  Then dropped down in them.  The splits.  Seriously.  Amy smiled, and again, most likely said all the right things to make him feel good about the talent he had brought forth.

But her dad had finally had enough.  He was shutting down all the home visits.  As Amy tells it, he hollered, “That’s it, this is CULL THE DWEEB day!  No more performances on the porch!”  He was done with all the Tom Foolery, and can you blame him?  There were boys risking hamstring injuries on his porch, and his daughter was too nice to simply not answer the door.  Her dad took over the job.

Cull the Dweeb Day.  If only we knew which exact calendar day it was, I’d petition for it to be a National Holiday, only maybe renamed “Cull the Crap Day”.

A few years ago, in a completely different life category, I had a Cull the Crap moment.  I was done being the person that others wanted or needed me to be.  So. Passed. Done.  I knew if I didn’t do something about it, my soul would drown.  (No one has ever accused me of being low on the dramatics scale.)  I had finally slowed down enough to feel it.  The loneliness. The sadness.  The drowning. The separation of self and spirit. It was as if the scales of “busy” had fallen from my eyes and the life I was living didn’t resemble anything that felt good, real, or true.  I had allowed others to make decisions I didn’t want to live with any longer. I basically had zero boundaries set up to teach others how to treat me, which allowed for disrespect and manipulation.  Please understand, I was just as guilty as any other party for the pattern of these relationships.  I had allowed the foundation to be laid the way it was, sacrificing the best parts of myself for some that didn’t care, and others that it would never be enough.

Here is the thing about drowning.  You just want to reach the surface to fill your lungs with enough air to breathe again.  There isn’t a map or under water navigation to the surface, you just have to look for the light and head towards it.  In efforts to breathe, my only decision was to face the light and honor my truth.   As much as I love list making, I didn’t sit down with pen and paper to decide who I would allow in my space and who had to go, I just focused on slowly becoming more myself every day.  Peace and joy were my guidance system.  More and more, when decisions or trouble would arise, I sent someone new to answer the door.  My true self, and not my representative.

This was new to some people, and they didn’t like it.  Change is not comfortable, especially when others didn’t choose it.  It didn’t work for some relationships and they decided to quit ringing the doorbell.  They weren’t comfortable with who was answering the door now.  Again, it wasn’t completely their fault, all they had known was the People Pleaser, and it worked for them.

The hardest thing about relationships is that they sometimes change or end before you are ready.  Sometimes they simply don’t want to walk down a path with you, and that is okay.  It’s also okay to walk the path meant for you.  Sometimes the most spiritual things we do are physical, like walking down a healthier path. It’s heartbreaking when this includes family, and sometimes just as sad when it’s friends.  Not every relationship is meant for a lifelong endurance.  When they are unhealthy and you are drowning, a Cull the Crap day is a good starting place.

Boundary Brooke is in charge of answering the door now.  Sometimes the old People Pleasing Representative will sneak to the front, and it never ends well.  Boundaries have to go up again, and shockingly, the circus on the porch gets tired and leaves.

Cull the Crap.  You can thank Amy’s sweet dad later.

 

  • The scenery photos are courtesy of my talented friend, Gary Richardson.

 

February 28, 2018 by
Books, Favorite Things, Gifts, Laughter, Lessons

A few of my Favorite Things….2017

I’m no Oprah…but I do have a few favorite things this year.  I wish this post was going to end with the surprise that every single one of you, and your cousin, would be getting all items mentioned.  Spoiler alert – No free candles.  However, I would love to share some favs. For shopping and perusing purposes, click on the title of each item to be directed to the link of the item mentioned!  (This is not a sponsored post.)

First and foremost – what I’m most excited about really highlights my shallowness and vanity.  I hope you guys can accept that, we can get deep later.  I can’t even wait to tell you about it….drumroll please.

Revlon Salon One-Step Hair Dryer & Volumizer

I know what you are thinking….Revlon?  I wish I could credit whatever podcast I heard about this on…because that girl deserves ALL the credit.  This blow dryer has changed by mornings and made my hair look like angels brushed it.  I’ve always wanted to be the girl who round brushed her hair, but accepted that I was the uncoordinated girl whose arms get tired and whiney when it comes to blow drying my hair.  Thank you Relvon, for hearing my cries and giving me volume.  Quickly.

Seamless: Understanding the Bible as One Complete Story

A friend of mine recently invited me to do this bible study with her, as she was leading a class at her church.  Three weeks after they started, I accepted the invitation.  Classic move.  Catching up on the study was easy, I didn’t want to put this down.  I’ve read the bible my entire life, done countless bible studies and devotionals, yet have never completely understood it. I’ve loved Angie Smith’s simple way of walking us through all the stories and tying them together so well!  It’s so good, and the videos for the end of each week can be found on Youtube…or call Kyla. I’m certain she would be happy to drive to you and show you how to find them.

I’m already feeling the urge to goal plan for the new year!   I’m old school, and need paper to write on.  So, choosing a new planner is a big deal for me.  Here are my favorites…

Erin Condern Lifeplanner 

My ol’ faithful….I’m on year 6 with this girl and like the vertical layout.  Mainly because I started using these before they gave an option and I’m not prone to change. Hence, the use of paper instead of my phone.

Cultivate What Matters Powersheets – An intentional goal planner.

I’m so excited about utilizing this in 2018.  I’ll most likely be ready to run for President with a few months of goal planning under my belt.  Watch out world. #goalcrushingtime

Anchored Press Devotional Planner

A Christian planner that keeps you focused on God as you organize your day.  Because my bosses in my real job tease me about having a paper planner (they are uber impressive at technology), I’ve had to draw the line at 3 written planners for 2018.  However, after I am President, I plan to add another.  Because I’ll have proven the power of PAPER!  Maybe my slogan will be “Go vintage, use paper! And pretty pens!”

Murad Oil Control Mattifier

My skin is not terribly oily, but by afternoon I had a shine on my t-zone. Not the dewy shine of youth – but the oily shine of dirty-tired (new word, you moms know).  I add a tiny bit of this, after my moisturizer in the morning and it does the trick.

Portfolio Collection Travel Tin Candles

I love candles, candlelight, and lovely smells….who doesn’t?  These little babies make it easy to travel with candles, so your hotel room can be cozy as well!  This brand comes in all sizes and scents, but I’m obsessed with the Portfolio Collection Travel Tin Candles, my favorite scents are linked below.  They make great little gifts or stocking stuffers!  Local friends, you can grab these at The Findery!

Pink Peony (Love!), Lavender Chaparral, Luxe Linen, Santa Barbara, Primrose Beach

Illuminidol Candles

Seriously, these make me laugh so hard and make the most fun gifts.  You can choose from a wide variety of their fun candles or design your own for an extra fee!  A great gift for the darling narcissist in your life. Or for the friends that enjoy a good giggle!  Just look how natural and happy Dolly looks in our entryway!  Gangs all here!  (Elvis not shown.)

 

L’Oréal Paris Voluminous Butterfly Lengthening Washable Mascara

Let me introduce myself, my name is Brooke and I am a mascara snob.  Actually, I am an eyelash snob.  I love big, long lashes.  I’m from Texas, the longer the lashes…the closer to heaven.  Or something like that.  I’ve had eyelash extensions, but they are so heavy – I felt like a butterfly just landed on my eyelid.  I’ve used stupid expensive mascara and have loved several.  The other day I was running through Walgreens and grabbed this little guy.  I’ve loved it every bit as much as the costly ones.  The wand is awesome and separating while lengthening.

Book Darts   

I will never read without these little babies again.  Ever.  Don’t even try to make me.  I’ll take them on a deserted island with my book, chapstick, and lotion.  (I’m counting on food being airdropped in for survival.) Book Darts are tiny little book marks that aren’t bulky, they are so thin and inconspicuous.  I always feel a deep need to underline and highlight special messages in books – an act that used book stores don’t appreciate.  They are so picky.  So, book darts to the rescue.

Pup Socks 

Or your cat. Or your favorite HUMAN!  Stop it.  I almost didn’t share this good news with you friends, because it might ruin a few gifts.  But, I’m a giver…so, you’re welcome.  What I can’t share are the ones I ordered for my friends and family members.  Stay tuned friends, my social media sites will be BLOWING UP with photos after Christmas.  Honey, Bunny, Ryder, Remy, Auzzie, Valentine, and Emma will be famous to more people than just their loving Momma.

Giddy Up, Eunice: (Because Women Need Each Other)

Loves, if you’re looking to get me a gift, please bring me Sophie Hudson.  If that is too weird, then fine…just read her books so we can chat.  This is her most recent book, and how I came to know her.  I laughed and cried and cheered all through it.  I’ve always been a supporter of women, fully believing that we don’t shine brighter by blowing out the candle of another.  What if we could instead reach out, up, and back to invest in all generations of our sisters.  We are all just walking each other home.  Some ahead of us, some behind us.  Let’s just all get there.

Muk Luks Slippers


I wish these house slippers came in wedges.  Life complete. Until then, I’ll collect every color/print of them in effort to trick people that I am wearing shoes. Comfort is so important to me, it should be its own love language.  Don’t know your size?  Head to Target and try them on!

Maui Babe Lotion

Don’t let the “after browning” part of the label fool you.  My “browning” comes from a bottle (shared below), this is my daily lotion.  It feels like conditioner for your skin, and it’s not sticky like some lotions can be.

Fake Bake Flawless Tanning System

Get your hands ready to clutch some pearls sister.  I am a 39 year old gal who spent her early years in a tanning bed. And loved it.  I even owned one.  The search to find something as relaxing as laying in that tanning bed, my skin warming while the fan blew on my burning skin…was unsuccessful. However, I did find a solution for a tan that doesn’t give you cancer like the UV rays do. (Please, I don’t want to hear about all the toxins being absorbed through the skin. Go elsewhere Fun&Beauty Police, just let me have my tan.)

Chatbooks…the modern app version of scrapbooking

I know, I know…you are all tired of me preaching about Chatbooks.  I simply have a fierce love for photos and memories, Chatbooks tie them both together.  Download the app and upload your photos from your phone, Instagram, and Facebook.

Bridgewater Candles

Light a candle, feed a child. For each container candle purchased Bridgewater donates funds to feed a child for one day!  These are made in America and sold in boutiques around the country as well, so buy local and support your store owners!  (Waco peeps, Salvage Sisters carry them.)  My favorite scent is Sweet Grace, the air freshener is amazing as well!

Fox Print

Fox Print is a great app for these fun vintage polaroid prints and magnets – all downloaded from pictures on your phone. Our laundry room fridge is filled with the sweetest faces.

 

And there you have it my friends.  By now, I’m sure you have learned that I get excited about the smallest of things.  If we can’t love the small things, how would we ever know how to appreciate the large things?

November 21, 2017 by
Family, Friendship, Gifts, Laughter

The Sanctuary of Twisted Words and Tied Tongues

The other day I got a phone call from the guy doing glass work on our shower remodel, informing me he was headed out to the house.  I wasn’t going to be there, so I began to tell him that we had also decided to re-do the mirrors in the bathroom and asked if he could take a look and give me a quote of cutting them down.  We were chatting about the kind of driftwood frame I was planning to build around the mirrors – the construction and heaviness of it, etc. I told him that I would have to send him a pic of what I had in mind to create, because basically I was just gonna “free ball” it.  There was a pause on the other end of the phone and the sound of an uncomfortable snicker.  It took me a full minute to realize that I had combined two thoughts: eye ball it and free hand it.  Instead, he now probably wonders about my anatomy and is certain of my lack of underwear.

It’s in these moments especially, silence is golden.

The inspiration for our “free-balling” mirror. Found on Pinterest.

I think this could be genetic, as I believe most people have their act more intact than myself or my sisters. We are always calling each other, mentally dying at the foot we just put in our mouth.   A few years ago, the baby sister worked at a bank back home, which entailed sometimes answering phone calls.  One day she picked up the ring and professionally said, “First State Bank, how can I help it?”  Realizing her mistake, she corrected it to, “First State Bank, how can I help YOU help it?”  Still determined to fix this she said, “First State Bank, how can I…..Oh, this is Kelsey.”  On the other end of the line, the President of the bank, calling from the main branch sighed and said, “Let me talk to Shelly.”

Silence is golden, so are phone skills.

She can’t be blamed really. Being the youngest sister, we set her up for failure of speech, as everyone else in the family spoke for her.  I’ve just learned to stop doing this a year ago, and fully plan on having some relapses. Big sister habits are hard to break. When she was in kindergarten, a parent of her little friend called the house to schedule a play date and asked for “Mrs. Mouse, Kelsey’s mom”.  After some confusion, they determined that they did call the right house, but had the wrong name.  We later figured out that Kelsey had told the friends at school her name was Kelsey Mouse.  A clear misunderstanding, as we had only been inserting her name into the Mickey Mouse song for 5 years: “K-E-L…S-E-Y  M-O-U-S-E, Kelsey Mouse….Kelsey Mouse…”

Bless her confused, silent self.

A while back we hosted our beloved friends, Amy and Kyle’s wedding reception on our back patio.  The baby sister was staying with us at the time and was a huge help in assisting the decorators and caterer.  After the reception got started, she did what she was best at and snuck away to her bedroom, hiding from all the people, because sometimes life is just too peopley. It was a beautiful evening, Amy and her party planner did a perfect job at turning the back porch into a gorgeous place to celebrate one of our favorite families blending and growing.

As the night came to a close, the few who were left here all congregated in the kitchen, eating leftovers and recalling the events of the day. Baby sister emerged from her room and one of the guys said, “Hey Kelsey!  Were you back there napping?”  Sweet sister shyly smiled, gave an awkward laugh and said, “Sometime.”  Singular. Neither party knew exactly what to do except awkwardly stare at each other.  The best part of watching the interaction was Kelsey’s full commitment to her reply.  She knew she had given a random, weird answer, but instead of correcting herself with a “silly me”, she just smiled and stared back until he walked away confused.

Michelle, our dear friend was also in the kitchen that night. Her family had recently moved away – a devastating loss to our hearts and neighborhood.  Amy and I both missed her terribly.  Michelle is the life of a back-porch party, always thinking up fun games like our yearly talent show, telling the kids campfire ghost stories, making us laugh as she acts out her most recent hilarious tales.  Michelle has big blue eyes that seem to get bigger when telling a story, she talks with her whole body, and when she tells a story you feel like you were literally there.  It’s a gift that keeps on giving.

Michelle, Amy, and I – Photo by Aurora Henry

Once they got settled into their new home, Michelle set out on some job interviews, one being at a private school.  She felt pretty good about how the interview was going as she sat in a lone chair, across from the entire Board, answering all their questions like a professional champ. Nearing the end of the interview, one of the Board members asked if her family went to church, and if so, where they attended.  Michelle wholeheartedly nodded and replied that they did indeed.  When he repeated the question asking where her family attended, she thought fast and replied, “Lady of the Lord.”  Still nodding, eyes huge, she was fully committed to her answer and church – all in.

Michelle does not fabricate stories, just churches.  In her defense, they had just moved to a new city with new churches with weird names.  In that weird, new city, not one church was named “Lady of the Lord”, however there were two Catholic churches that they planned to visit, one had the word “Lady” and one had “Lord” in it.  Sometimes we have to create our own spaces.

When Amy and I heard this story, we howled. We laughed until we cried at the visual of our precious and hilarious friend sitting in a chair, facing an entire board of a private school, eyes wide, head nodding, stoically telling them with assurance that she attends a church in her head.

Ah, but the Lady of the Lord church does exist, as it is now the name of our back-porch sanctuaries.  Appropriately titled and truly one of the most peaceful churches that I’ve ever attended.  We are ladies of the Lord, He comforts us through the friendship of each other, speaks to us through sounds of nature, and shows us love by the gift of a safe place.

God in us, among us, and for us.

Even when our tongues are tied, our words are tangled, and our lives are sometimes twisted.  He knows our hearts are for Him, and I imagine even has to sometimes shake His head and simply chuckle.

 

*Featured photo by Asher Creek Photography.

November 6, 2017 by
Family, Friendship, Gifts, Grace, Hope, Laughter, Love, Prayer, Renewed

Friendship – The Real Stuff

For the times in life where I have struggled to catch my breath, friendship has served as my inhaler.  Stressed?  Better call the besties, because friendship can literally breathe life back into a weary soul.

Learning how to breathe is in direct response to calming my spirit. Calming my spirit is in direct response to letting things go, and accepting that there are just some things I cannot control. Who wants to live like a fish out of water, not knowing where their next breath is coming from? This is called anxiety – the feeling of standing on unstable ground.  During these shaky moments is when we reach for support.

Recently, our family went through a true crisis. I sent a text out to my friends asking for prayers and advice.  They recognized that I was at my capacity for handling the situation, my spirit was stretched and about to bust. What friendship did in that moment, is show up.  Showing up isn’t always literal, but it is always emotional. Sometimes it’s driving two hours to sit with you at the hospital, a phone call, a simple text checking on you or a funny meme to lighten your mood. Friendship is the scaffolding that supports and holds us up during the rough patches.

A gathering of friends for my 30th birthday…just a few months ago. Or 9 years. Same.

We were made to represent the love of God for our people here on earth, that each person we journey with may have a deeper understanding of God’s love for them.  It has been said that we are all just walking each other home.  I couldn’t love that thought more, healthy relationships remind us of the goodness of God, by bringing more divine into our lives.

Friendship can never be authentic unless you are honest and vulnerable. True friendship is the real stuff – not the artificial sweetener that attempts to taste like the real stuff.  True friendship is the pure cane sugar of life -messy calories and all.  When you find that tribe member, the building of a friendship begins.  Growing up, I never had a clubhouse, but this is how I picture the home of friendship.  When one shares something vulnerable, it’s as if she is handing you a brick to add to the building of the clubhouse.  You, in return, share or confide by handing her a stone to build on.  This goes on, in no specific time frame or rhythm, and one day you look up and realize your clubhouse is built.  It’s not a perfect clubhouse made of one single material or straight lines, but it is beautiful.  It is a place for both parties to be nourished under the shelter of friendship.

When one shows up for another, it’s like having a decorating meeting inside your well-loved clubhouse.  Pitchers in hand, ready to pour into whichever soul needs it at the moment.  If you look for fault in your friends, you will find it. We are all human. But if you continue to only look for the lovely, that’s what you will see.  If one can’t be there today, be thankful for the one who is.  They all have their own purpose in your life.  Your friendships will show up in all different ways, like a gorgeous rainbow.

There are few things better than a can’t-catch-your-breath-laugh with girlfriends.  Recently a group of us drove south to hear a beloved author, Jen Hatmaker, speak at the Austin Bass Concert Hall.   Afterwards, we walked outside to wait on our requested Uber.  We stood out front, waiting on Thor, chatting about where we should eat dinner.  I glanced up and saw Jen Hatmaker herself walking out of the building with her entourage, I really wanted to run and tell her specifically what her writing has meant to me, then I remembered the chapter called “Fangirl” in her latest book. She encourages us to fangirl Jesus and our friends instead of famous people who we don’t know. Inwardly, I rolled by eyes, whispered “fine”, and turned back to fangirl my gals.

Perfect timing, as a minivan pulled up, the driver got out and the automatic minivan doors opened.  What service Thor, you have earned yourself a rating of Uber excellence young man.  As Kristy and Patricia started to get in, the side door jammed while in auto mode, which caused a constant dreadful sound, kind of like a possum was stuck in it.  All four of us looked through the car to the driver, who was standing by his door just staring at us. “Sir, what’s wrong with your door?”  Blank stare.  “SIR, can you come fix your door?  Something is wrong with it.”  At one point, Marlo pushed through the other two and started trying to shove it open while saying through clenched teeth, “Oh. I. got. this!” – a word for each shove. Resolved that we weren’t climbing in on that side, we all went to the drivers side, got in and was buckling up when a random lady came over and said, “What have y’all done to the door?”  Not knowing who she was or what business she had in our night, we stuck to the Stranger-Danger rule and ignored her, continuing about the task of getting into our Uber.  Stranger-Danger-Lady wouldn’t give up with the questions though.  Sweet Patricia just kindly smiled at her as the rest of us ignored her.  She said something like, “This is my car.”,  Ugh, lady…go away.  In really slow talk so she would understand and quit asking questions, we replied, “No ma’am, this is our Uber, Thor is our driver.”  Done with the shenanigans she yelled, “THIS IS MY *&$%ing CAR and you broke my door!”  She was further thrilled when we sat there staring at her, as the situation took some time to soak in.  The situation of mistaking the valet guy for Thor, our Uber driver.  No wonder the Thor (who wasn’t Thor) just stared at us without words when we ask him to please fix his door. Just as we climbed into the poor sailor-mouth-lady’s car, we piled back out.  Back out into the rain to once again, to wait for our Uber – in the Valet line.

To be clear – the next car we got into was the correct one – Cliff’s car.  Which sounds a lot like Thor…

Send kindness out in big, generous waves, send it near and far, send it through texts and e-mails and calls and words and hugs, send it by showing up, send it by proximity, send it in casseroles, send it with a well-timed “me too”, send it with abandon.  Put out exactly what you hope to draw in, and expect it back in kind and in equal measure. Sow seeds of affirmation and goodness and grace into others, and you will reap the devotion of well-loved friends.”  Jen Hatmaker – Of Mess and Moxie

Put simply – it takes being a friend to have a friend. I’ve been on both sides of this spectrum. My first years into adulthood were some of the loneliest.  I was in a growth gap, past who I was and not yet grown into who I was becoming.  I don’t like the thought of growing out of a friendship, I’d rather be grateful for the season that we had it.  Not all relationships will make the duration of your journey, some are just meant for a season.

Pay attention to those who show up in big and little ways. Pay attention to those who support you, who defend you, who encourage you to rise above and be better in this moment. Surround yourself with honest and loyal people, those who know when to push you and when to encourage you to pivot.  Nurture your friendships, show up for your people, love on your tribe, and preserve that beloved clubhouse – it can always use another brick or decoration.  We cannot do life alone, we were made to connect.

Life is brutal and life is beautiful.  The brutal doesn’t break us because the beautiful sustains us.”

 

 

 

 

 

October 30, 2017 by